July 20, 2021 | by: Gregg Hunter | 0 comments
Posted in: Genesis 35
Every child is a gift from God. Parents of multiple children understand that each child is special—each child is worthy of love and affection, and needs special attention from their parents. We show love to our children in different ways because they are each unique, but every parent still makes a point to show love to each child…
Or at least they should. Jacob plays favorites with his children. He honors the sons of Rachel--Joseph and Benjamin--above all of their brothers, and this leads to endless conflict within the family. This is most popularly demonstrated through his treatment of Joseph and his famous coat, but it is also evident from the time of Benjamin’s birth, as we will see in today’s Scripture passage.
Please read Genesis 35:16-21.
Unfortunately, death in childbirth was a rather common occurrence in the ancient world. Each couple took chance with death when they conceived a child. Jacob has been blessed so far in that none of his wives or surrogate wives have died in childbirth. But the twelfth son is the one who broke the lucky streak.
As Rachel suffered through childbirth, she named her son based on her pain (“Ben-Oni” means “son of my sorrow”). But Jacob would not endure having his son’s name constantly remind him of his beloved wife’s death. He had to change the name to something that gave him more comfort.
That point at least is understandable. The trouble comes when Jacob decides on the new name for the child. “Benjamin” means “son of my right hand,” which signifies a special place of protection and favor. In giving his son this name, Jacob was declaring that this child would have a special place of honor in the home.
Every child is special, but when Jacob lifts up one child above all of his other children, he is implying that Benjamin’s brothers are not as special; that Reuben and Simeon and Levi aren’t as loved by their father as this little baby. Jacob grew up in a home where his father favored one child over the other. He should have known better! But he passed this tragic favoritism and jealousy onto his own children.
As parents, we need to find unique ways to make each of our children feel like they are the most precious person in the world to us. But we must do this without making their siblings jealous. There are many ways to do this, but here are a few that I have found to be useful:
These are just some suggestions that I have found useful. There are many more ideas out there, so find what works for you. But don't make the same mistake as Jacob. In giving his youngest son the place of honor in his family, he sowed the seeds of strife that would define his children for generations. Instead, let each of your children know that you love them, and do so in their own special way.
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